Kimblee, literally no one invited you

[explosivecombat]

Hey hey!

This is Dal again, I'm currently playing the social failball that is Kiyotaka Ishimaru - his journal name has been changed to ardent, but everything should redirect and everything should be fine on that front! (...apologies to anyone who's gotten tag notifs and gone "okay who the hell is this" over the last couple of days, as it didn't occur to me to actually, y'know, say anything until now. orz)

But that isn't the point of this post - I'm bringing a second character in today, one that may be at least passingly familiar to a good amount of you. This is Solf J Kimblee, from the Fullmetal Alchemist manga. He has a very gentlemanly demeanor externally, the sort to offer to carry your luggage and ask about your family and be good with your kids; he likes discussing philosophy and psychology, he has an interest in music and the finer things in life, he's always wearing a classy-as-hell suit + hat + gloves combo straight out of the 1910s, he's very polite in speech and mannerisms (...usually) and he's very aesthetically-centered, striving for the highest standard of beauty in the work that he does. "The work that he does" just happens to involve finding new and creative ways to destroy things via massive explosion, manipulating the hell out of everyone just to see what will happen, throwing spanners in everybody's works, and voluntarily letting himself be used as a human weapon of war just for kicks.

...yeah.

So! This psuedo-classy person-of-mass-destruction is returning post-canon (so he has all his spoilers) with all of his memories of his previous stay in Johto - and he was here for a year and a half, so he remembers a good amount. Like having a high ranking in Team Rocket. And being rich as hell. And having a ridiculously overpowered team of Pokémon and all eight badges and guess who's not going to be happy upon waking up as a grunt again, boy howdy. As a bit of a consolation prize, he's being reunited with his previous starter at level 30 - said starter being a Voltorb that he screwed up royally with the first time and hates him completely.

Clearly, Kimblee cannot start out with nice things, but that's okay! He'll be back to reminding everyone why he shouldn't be allowed to have nice things at all soon enough. (...and yes, he is not above pulling Seth out again, for those who remember that.)

If you need to reach me, AIM (AsylumBred) is probably your best bet, though I can also be PMed at this journal or poked on Plurk at InstantEternity - I don't usually add people on Plurk unless I know them, but private-plurking should be turned on. If it's not, please yell at me.

I look forward to threading with all of you again!

Comments

[begetsvengeance]

Nice to see you back with Kimblee, Dal! I was starting to notice a severe lack of explosions in Route.

[explosivecombat]

Well! We can't have that, now, can we?

[begetsvengeance]

But of course. Characters in the game might start to feel safe or something. And who would want that?

[explosivecombat]

Oh, precisely.

[doitrockapella]

NIETZSCHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

[explosivecombat]

WELL HELLO THERE LOCKE IT'S NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN

HE SUPPOSES

GOOD LORD HE GOT THE CAPS AND THE BIG FONT AND EVERYTHING HE'S FLATTERED

[doitrockapella]

MY GOD IT HASN'T BEEN THE SAME WITHOUT YOU, YOU EXISTENTIAL BASTARD

WE HAD HOLIDAYS THAT ACTUALLY WEREN'T WRECKED

IT WAS MADNESS

[explosivecombat]

OH DON'T WORRY HE'LL GET RIGHT ON FIXING THAT, THEN

IN THE MEANTIME WHAT IS THIS HE HEARS ABOUT YOU ACTUALLY SHOWING UP ON VIDEO DURING THOSE LIKE SIX WEEKS HE WAS ABSENT

SOMEBODY ISN'T PLAYING FAIR HERE, WOMAN

[doitrockapella]

SERVES YOU RIGHT FOR UP AND DISAPPEARING

MISSED THE CHANCE TO SEE ME IN A PROM DRESS

MISSED THE CHANCE TO SEE ME ON THE VIDEOTUBES




also I put your philosopher's stones on a charm bracelet, that's not a crime against your delicate sensibilities or anything, is it.

[explosivecombat]

WOULD IT BE TOO MUCH LIKE FLIRTING TO SAY THAT WE'LL JUST HAVE TO MAKE UP FOR ALL OF THAT LATER, THOUGH...



...honestly, he's more concerned with your delicate sensibilities, knowing what those things are and what he used to do with them

[doitrockapella]

...MAYBE

You know ordinarily I would have compunctions about the idea of flirts with you but I am also rebounding like hell and I can only imagine my BFF the departed pirate captain would be 100% supportive of me making egregiously bad life choices like this assuming they ultimately resulted in me getting some.

OH, THE POOR INFLUENCES ON MY LIFE.




in fairness she almost had them made into earrings which arguably would've been like a thousand times worse once she figured out she had the concentrated mass of like millions of hideously murdered innocent people dangling like bling from her face

[explosivecombat]

Oh, come now, the most terrible influences are also usually the most enjoyable, in the end.



well, it's actually more like dozens, but the point actually does remain, yes

but if it makes her feel any better Kimblee used to eat them. much like a drug mule. and just spit them out whenever he needed them because he has inhuman physical control like that.

...yeah so about those "charms" she's wearing

[doitrockapella]

Wait, whoa, hold up, there is suddenly a whole lot of id in this exchange where traditionally we are pretty much all about the superego.

...also for the record bad dudes traditionally have a knack for tempting me over to the dark side no matter how hard I try to be legit and while I am trying really hard to reform here, uh. Suddenly I have my doubts as to how well that's gonna go over.



...oh my god she's wearing regurgitated dead people

[explosivecombat]

Well, to be fair, it's all about the superego until the wanton destruction starts. Admittedly, you haven't really seen anything yet in that regard, so you can be forgiven for not knowing about all that.



...pretty much yes

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

HOORAY!

IF you want, Cobra has some nice things of Kimblee’s that he’d be more than happy to hand back. He’s sort of committed to attacking a town with them though…and then jail, so it might take a little while. This is the sort of thing that happens when people give him exploding ice cream as a parting gift. ):

[explosivecombat]

An accurate representation of Kimblee's reaction upon returning to Johto, I swear to god.

No, but really, he will be so glad to see this crazy bastard again, and once he finds out where Cobra went...well. Um. He'll be sure to send the dude something in prison, at least. Unfortunately nothing explosive or a shiv or anything, though he imagines those would also be useful, but really, man. Jail blows. at least it's not seven years

And really, if you're enjoying the ice cream that much you can keep it because oh my god, you are putting it to far better use than he ever did.

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

Poor Kimblee.

Considering Cobra's last stay in prison was about five minutes, these two weeks are going to feel like seven years to him. Kimblee might want to mute the gear when Cobra starts complaining about it.

So then Cobra will keep the ice cream and give back Yanmega and Electrode as soon as he's able to? Is that okay with you?

[itsjustdust]

Obito will be SO HAPPY

FINALLY SOMETHING RIGHT

[explosivecombat]

...Obito bro if this is your idea of something going right then I don't know what to tell you

[itsjustdust]

...He was starting to think he was cursed okay ;-;

[soggypastry]

Just when things were starting to settle down for them--xDD oh he may get shoved off that ledge after all.

Lightning's not gonna like it one bit, but I'm glad to see him back. :3 this is gonna be goooooood.

[explosivecombat]

I'm glad to be back! And he will be...not terribly glad to see Lightning but he will tolerate her for now because she kind of entertains him, tbh.

And come now, he can't have things going too well for all of you, now, can he?

[soggypastry]

And she will be so pleased to be good for something. xDD.

No, clearly not. That wouldn't be the fair thing to do and Kimblee's all about being fair.

[explosivecombat]

Hey, he is nothing if not an equal-opportunity asshole.

[ragnarok_strike]

get out >:C

...is what raz would say

if he were still here
rip in peace, raz

[explosivecombat]

don't worry raz

he will raise plenty of hell in your memory

gone but not forgotten

[ragnarok_strike]

oh gosh darn it

that is the opposite of what he would want!!!

[usedshooshpap]

sweeeet

[explosivecombat]

Oh yes. So looking forward to this, man.

[heartdive]

hey man... karkat missed his chatbuddy.

[meikyuubutterfly]

YES, EXCELLENT, now when my favorite insane FMA character is back in the game Korra get ready to kick his ass one day.

Which clearly means that I'm still screaming of joy of seeing him back. ♥

[saxsongs]

-- but we just got rid of the most dangerous Rocket members and now they're coming back.

As grunt, which Ren could laugh at, but won't cause he's not dumb.

I on the other hand am glad to see Kimblee around once again.